Nov 6, 2007

Just rambling...

Now, let me start this off by saying that I am still a working woman and will be for a while, but I've been thinking...
Is it silly to feel called to be a homemaker? I have been thinking a lot about how I feel when I'm at work. I usually feel tense, dumb, and unliked. I would go into why, but it's best not to blog about your job. I think about how I feel when I'm at home, accomplished, organized, and creative. I got to wondering whether wanting to be home is rather common place, because wouldn't any woman rather be at home? Well, maybe not. I'm pretty sure that I enjoy a lot of odd things that other woman don't.

I enjoy cutting coupons and challenging myself to see what was saved at the end of my grocery bill. I enjoy trying new recipes and then hearing the praise from my husband or friends about the taste. I love to write a to-do list in the morning, making it a little bit longer than what I could expect to get done, and then checking each one off. I TiVo Martha, and actually watch it. I adore the Supernanny. I fantasize about having time to make homemade sauces, dog food/biscuits, and baby food. And someday, I dream about giving my children a warm home where they feel they have a mother devoted to them.

So the question is, am I being niave? Am I looking at homemaking through rose-tinted glasses? Does every woman want this? The bottom line is, although I dream about it, it will be years before I may get to try it for myself. Maybe I'm already doing the work I am meant to be doing. You know, the grass always does seem greener.

9 comments:

Jen said...

I don't think it's strange at all to feel that way. I often feel torn between two worlds. I love teaching, but I love being a wife and mother. Sometimes I think that I am short changing both worlds by doing both things. I never have time to attend sporting events for my students and I don't have a lot of time to really plan awesome activities for class. On the other hand, I only see my kids in the evenings and weekends and I'm worried that I'm missing out on "mom" stuff. I rarely have time to cook (and I want to).
Hopefully I will find a balance soon because staying home completely is not an option for me.

You seem to have a lot of creative "homemaker" talents, and I'm sure you are great at your job as well.

Being a "homemaker" is a full time job for sure.

:)

Patty Ann said...

I'm not sure if Europe, Asia, and the rest of the Americas discourage women quite as much as our mass media does from choosing to be home. But I do believe you were called to be a PA.
Making your home a sanctuary for when you come home from work, is also a great way to invest your time.

Meagank7 said...

Well I think you if you worked in a job where you got more praise for your accomplishments there perhaps you would enjoy it more.

Shari said...

Both jobs have there good and bad points. I found the best of both worlds is to work 2-3 days per week. You still have time for everything but can enjoy your time at home. The best memories are little tea parties with the kids, reading books, watching them build forts, seeing all the canned jars on the counter. I don't have many work memories. I just love being a mom and wife.

Carrie said...

I totally know how you feel Ang. It kills me that I sit at work everyday without feeling much of a sense of accomplishment. I feel so much better when I send a Saturday cooking and cleaning than I do going to work everyday. I totally agree with Shari, once you have kids, you should consider working part time. Your memories are going to be of those spent at home with you family, not at work. I can't wait to be a homemaker!

Chris said...

Wow, you just made me realize why I do work so much. Although I very much dislike my job right now because I am so behind and can't catch up, I think I spend more time doing it because I lack the normal womanly duties at home. Especially when now I am being thought of to do more things at work, such as being a future leader, meeting with prospective new hires, or sitting with our CFO to talk about the focus of women at Dow. But I am never motivated to do any of the "homemaker" stuff you listed, except see how much I can save at the grocery store :-)

Amber said...

Angie-

I think that is AWESOME!!! A ton of my friends feel just like you do and are full time stay at home moms and homemakers. And they LOVE it!!! They have warm, happy homes with loving families. I truly believe that if you feel that way you should do everything in your power to make it happen! God put those feelings in you for a reason. I, however, as much as I LOVE being at home I also LOVE working, so part-time is perfect for me. A lot of times I wish I felt the way you did, but I have to accept that God created me differently I guess!

mamins said...

Oh dear Angie - you are not naive. You're being inspired but an actual real, spiritual feeling! Working for MMPC is definitely more than a full time job! I think we both share similar work hours and it's incredibly stressful with very little feeling of accomplishment. I too love to cook on my day off, maybe even get the cookbooks out again!

I think creating a warm nurturing environment for yourself and Brian right now is commendable and is preparing you for the days when children will fill that home. You are going to make an amazing mother and parent and we are blessed to have you with Brian. I've experienced some of the feelings you are going through right now - and I think you know what I'm talking about, and this season of the year can be particularly challenging.

Get in the mode to at least shrink your work week and I think you'll feel so much better. I know I'm looking forward to being able to say "I don't have to work so hard!!!"

Love You!!!

Anonymous said...

Angie,

Keep believing that it will happen... and it will!!

Hang in there!!